Dreaming Big is Only the Start

Here and Now…Then and There…

I think it’s funny when you look back on your past self. The things that you used to worry about, the person that you were, and all the things you used to feel. 

Recently, I started my new job as a manager. A Manager! A job that was normally given to someone with 5 to 7 years of experience, but I suppose I was around at the right time. My direct manager had problems with too many possible candidates being too stuck in their ways as a senior, that she pinned her hopes on someone more junior in their career. Long story short, when I graduated college in 2013, I had no idea where I’d be in one year… two years… ten years. I wanted to be a Technical Writer at the time. One year later I became a full-fledged Technical Recruiter. Now exactly 2 years since graduating I’ve become a Manager. 

I remember all the things I used to care about. So badly wanting to become a Pharmacist and live out my mom’s dream for her. All those years of hurt feelings, being overly too patient with people who only saw their happiness in hurting others, and cracking little by little. Wear and tear does catch up to you – that’s for sure. Yet, I look at myself now. There’s so much that I need to learn. It’s all so new to me! Yet so exciting that I’m moving up in life and becoming more and more experienced in the world. Who knows… going up as a manager in a few years and possibly be a young Director or even higher. 

Moments like these really make me want to work hard to shoot for the stars.  From here, I pray that I’ll only go upward…

Commuting Too Much

Since 2008 I’ve been commuting. Back then it was for school. Even though I was tired, it felt like a different kind of tired. I was mentally and physically drained, and yet I wasn’t so out of it the way I am now. However, back then it was just a 40 minute commute rather than the 75+ minutes commute that I endure 5 days a week straight that I go through now.

Nowadays, it’s just plain hard. I’m not too interested in doing things – writing, cooking, cleaning, reading, learning something new, playing the piano, drawing, etc that I used to do. Any task other than to go home, eat (preferably something easy to “cook”) and sleep is a stretch. A loooong stretch.

I honestly I don’t know how people do it. I’ve heard of stories of people who have an even longer commute that they’ve endured for 10 years or longer. Do people build up the stamina for it? I’ve been commuting this long distance for 8 months now and my stamina is deteriorating rather than building. Many people tell me to exercise and although I know there is a possibility of my stamina increasing, there’s a good chance that there’s a 2 weeks to a few months period where I will be dead tired before the week even begins.

At the same time, it made me start wondering, why should I commute so much? I know people say that you should endure more while you’re young, but then why? As a recruiter, I’ve seen some people willingly agree to long commutes while others will strictly say no. Is it because they have a choice? Is it because they’ve endured it in the past and now have come to understand that commuting is not easy thing? Whatever the reason, the next time I switch for a new job, I’m definitely going for something closer to home. I’ve learned my lesson that I am not meant to commute long distances. As great as an opportunity is, I definitely have to value my health more.

So hats off to you people out there that have long commutes and still maintain it after so many years.

Facebook and Sexy Photos

I don’t go on Facebook very often. I have it logged in on my phone so that I can wish people “Happy Birthday” on their birthdays if I don’t see them in person or receive messages if anyone wanted to contact me and has no other means of contact. Yet those moments when I go on, I often see friends or “friends” who post pictures of themselves in sexy outfits and/or their nights at the clubs. All the time I see these comments, “You look gorgeous!!!”, “Dayyyuumm”, “Beautiful!”, “OMG I’m so jealous!”, etc. However when I look at these photos, I just tilt my head in confusion. Most of the time I don’t see this extremely beautiful and gorgeous girl that they talking about it. Maybe I’m just a jerk for saying this, but honestly I don’t. It’s good that they are helping the person to feel about themselves as they truly do feel that this girl is drop-dead gorgeous. So I choose to remain silent so that I’m not the jerk that brings about negativity.

Maybe I’m just a tough critic. The more I thought about it, I thought maybe it’s just values. I don’t see a tight-fitting outfit as amazing. I just see it as another outfit that can look good depending on the body-type with the right patterning and colors chosen with the all the jackets or accessories. In the past, I have said that some people with these sexy outfits look great. It’s not that I haven’t. I am a person who understands fashion, but I admit, a few certain styles in fashion. That maybe I can’t just appreciate these tight-fitting sexy outfits.

If the case is that as long as the girl does make-up and wears sexy outfits that deems her as drop-dead gorgeous, then I rather choose to never understand this. I’d rather save my commentary for those who I truly believe deserve the praise for their beauty.

I’d definitely love to hear what others have to say about this. Are others out there confused like me too?

To Long-Time Friends

This past weekend I found myself spending time with two of my long-time friends on two separate days. One of which is my buddy Orchidus here on WP whom I’ve known since our first year in college and the other is a friend of mine since 7th grade. Throughout the years, it’s understandable that we don’t always talk to each other, see each other or even see the others’ footprints on our haunting grounds online. However, it’s moments like this weekend that make me feel like the friendships will definitely continue on.

On Saturday Orchidus and I had lunch after not seeing each for… who knows how long. Afterward we went around the area checking out the local shop. We first went to “Savers” and once we passed the two sets of doors, it was funny how we gravitated towards the same thing – the book shelves. Tons and tons of books. Old and new. It’s moments like those that make me realize how great it is when you’re with someone who has the same taste in things as you do. Even in the comic book store or any store after, we chatted, we geeked out, and most of all we had fun. Definitely an awesome way to spend a Saturday.

Then Sunday rolled around. Off I went to meet my dear, sweet “K”, the bride-to-be. It felt just like yesterday we were just 12-year-olds reading manga, talking about anime, school stuff, t.v. shows and what-not and here she was moments away from her wedding. Some part of me feels like I’m getting old. One-by-one my friends are getting married left and right and then some even having a kid or two. “K” herself is expecting one on the way.

After Junior High, I didn’t speak much with “K”. We texted more during our college days and kept in touch here and there, but once together, it felt like the old us again. That feeling is truly priceless.

In short, I hope these friendship will last for our lifetimes and more.

New Year, New Blog for 2015

Hello All,

Thank you reading my posts since 2013! I’ve decided to wipe my blog clean to start fresh in 2015. I want to sustain and update a blog that represents a new era in my life. So look forward to new blogs in 2015!

– Suzu


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