In a recent conversation with Lady Cat, I asked her about her younger sister wanting to join us on our adventures. Lady Cat told me that her sister wanted to spend more time with her, hence she wanted to join us on our adventure. An odd thing to say, though I wonder if there’s a hint of jealousy or the stereotypical younger sister wanting to do everything her older sister does – including hanging out with her friends.
There was one instance in the past that I had agreed for her younger sister to join us. Although it was supposed to be our “bff-reunion-day” (after not seeing each other for over half a year), it turned into “sisters day” where her younger sister would want her attention and I became the third wheel. It’s quite an awkward moment when you become the third-wheel to your best friend and your best friend’s sister… especially when you’re the driver… After that, without my mentioning, we try to avoid any further sisters days.
I value my time with my good friends and best friends. They mean the world to me – the people who stuck by me through all the craziness, cheer me on, try to help me become better,etc. Maybe I’m being selfish, but that little time that I have with them, I can’t say I’m a fan of sharing it, especially if we don’t meet that often. But then again, who wouldn’t feel that way?
I once had a housemate that was… questionable. There were clear signs of illegal drugs that she might have taken on her nights out that I wouldn’t question if she did other substances. She was a girl who seemed to curse her fate, but looking from the inside out, she just seemed like a girl who was lost and looking for stability – a love to call her own and something tangible to remind her that she is in fact, alive.
Now all things aside, this housemate went from job-to-job-to-job. After moving in she got into a job where she was making food for other people. That started to make me question if drug tests are taken, but I suppose fast food places don’t care as much or so I thought until later she earned her way into a career at a Fortune 500 company’s warehouse site. Now I’m starting to question whether drug tests are as great of an indicator as companies make it seem. “You must pass the drug test before you can start.” The words that I’ve heard many times for many companies, but if they are not as reliable as they claim to be, then what of the work? I suppose at the end of the day it’ll surface when it surfaces… or so one would hope… at least before the name of the company is tarnished by the drug test that wasn’t as accurate as claimed…
Since maybe… August? September? I’ve been on-and-off working on making 1000 cranes. My roommate accidentally bought a box of origami paper to make 1000 cranes rather than paper stars so she just gave it to me since I know how make paper cranes. A few months in and so far I’ve gotten down to 600 more to go. I can’t say it’s easy. It takes a lot of time and dedication, especially if you want to do more than 10 a day or even 50 a day or however much you decide. I started out with 20 a day which was reduced to 10 a day then reduced again to 5 a day and October came and went without me making a single one. It was after I finished knitting my first scarf that I thought that it’s high-time I finish making those cranes too. So in a matter of a few days I made 100 cranes. It’s been tough.
Sure the movements are repetitive, but sitting for that long to create so many and then continuously do so… it takes so much patience and concentration. Honestly, I’ve grown used to doing such things, but still… it made me realize that as much as I want to do things as obsessively as I used to, that car accident that happened still is a hindrance to me right now. After about 15 cranes, my back has already started to give out, so I’m trying to figure out alternative methods to getting it done. So far I’ve tried making 10 cranes here and there throughout the day, which now has changed to me folding a bunch half way earlier in the day and then folding it to completion later in the day. It feels like it takes less time, though in theory it shouldn’t. (It’s amazing what you can trick the mind into thinking.) But we shall see. I hope to get them done by the end of the year… or maybe even by the end of November.
Often times, people in my life would ask me how is it that I know so much about everything. Well, I do not know everything, but if I did know everything, that would be awesome! Jokes aside, I learned through the years that the more you are curious, the more you learn. I’ve spent most of my younger years learning through textbooks, novels, and through the lives of others around me. Yet what I was missing was the part where I went out and searched for my own answers. It was harder back then… I wasn’t in the environment that nourished curiosity. If anything, curiosity was squashed faster than an army of ants down a busy street. So the more I resisted, the more I learned.
Now with the age of you-can-learn-anything-on-youtube, it’s not hard to learn anything new. Though some things are better to be taught in person…It’s a certain of level of experience that you can gain by watching it in person rather than the angle chosen by the person who posted the video. Also, when in person, you could ask the person questions as they come to mind. I digress.
I feel like more people should be curious. I very much dislike environments and the people who are okay with squashing the curiosity of young children. Where’s the magic? Where’s that spark that will allow them to go out and look for it? I feel that those who resisted, are those that end up big – the ones that kept their spark and the magic alive. But that’s hard! It’s not like we knew since we were young that we shouldn’t be so obedient. Like we knew what was right and what was wrong… at least to our parents, but it was only until we were older that we built that for ourselves or that we should.
To keep it short, I hope everyone brings back that spark in them to be curious, because it’s okay to be curious. It’s okay to have a different right and wrong than other people (as long it’s legal) and it’s okay to try something new.
After another 6 hours of knitting today, I finally finished my scarf. I think in total, this scarf has taken me a good 50 hours to complete. It’s about 52 inches or 56 if scretched a bit and completely imperfect, but I’m proud of it all the same.
Two years ago, I decided that I wanted to learn how to knit. It was on a whim, but I envied people for years for their awesome skills in knitting scarfs, sweaters, and whatever you can name. Same for crocheting! Then I thought, “I can do it too!” So my friend (who I shall name “Lady Cat” from here onwards), has always been a supporter of me trying out new crafts. When I was nervous about what to buy and spending on needles, she bought me my first skein of yarn and needles. From there began my journey…
Honestly, I doubt the scarf would have really taken 50 hours. It ended around there just because I unraveled the scarf a good 5 times. The first time was because I was learning how to knit and perl, then decided on just knitting all the way through, but make too many mistakes that I couldn’t tolerate it and so I unraveled it. The second time was for the same reason. The third time I unraveled it since I realized that if I continued just knitting it all the way through, by the time I would get to the end, it would prob only be a little over two feet max and I would need another skein of yarn or even more that that…so that’s when I searched for other patterns. After a bit of googling I came across lace patterns and my light bulb went off. It makes the scarf more elastic in nature and also, utilizes less yarn for a longer length. It was perfect!
Fast forward to one year later, I haven’t touched the scarf since the previous winter. During the summer I never have any enthusiasm to knit a wool scarf… honestly, would anybody??? and by the time it’s winter, the enthusiasm is there, yet life kept me so busy. So after a few days of knitting again… fast forward to another year and here I am, finally finished the scarf. I know it’s because I’m unemployed and have all the time in the world that I’m getting around to finishing up the scarf. But what better way to make use of precious time than to tie loose ends?
A girl I used to work with said, “It’s not hard finding a job.” Two years ago and even now, I still think it’s hard to find a job. Maybe she was one of the lucky ones that was always in a good location that people would take her up. I’ve personally seen her resume and I couldn’t say it was extraordinary, yet somehow she never had an issue finding a job. As for me, I’m stuck wondering when it’ll be before I get that call – that ONE call that would change it all. I’ve applied to over 50 places and continuing to apply everywhere and to anything that I could qualify for (or even some places where I’m off by a year or two in experience). You never know… you just never know.
Today I received an interview/introduction call from a recruiter to a job that I applied for last night. The guy on the line clearly wasn’t a recruiter, but someone who was trying to do the task on top of whatever it is that he was assigned to do. To say the least, the job description that he posted and what the company really wanted after that 20 minutes conversation with him was clearly not the same. Could I do the job? Sure. What are the caveats? A whole lot. More or less, they are looking for someone with around 2 years of work experience to do an entire department integration from scratch. Honestly, anyone can learn to do that, but I know that the major problem with that is not me learning how to make it happen, but how willing the company is to pay for the needed systems (which from experience, never go well. )
Honestly, I know I’m not in a good location. I live far from where the jobs are and that makes me lower on the candidate lis….t or at least that’s what I thought. So I finally put my pride to the side and applied locally – still nothing. Changed my resume accordingly, wrote personalized cover letters, etc. So… I really don’t know what’s going on… just no luck finding a job…
To think at this age, parents of my friends would contact me in order to get to their kids, it’s funny and it brings back memories of those school days. I suppose I was always the responsible one or the serious one that parents of friends would flag me down to locate their kids, which I thought was okay. Not that I was allowed out much, but for the most part, at least my friends would respond to my text versus their parents and I could help in some way. Yet at this age and my friend’s parents still doing so, it’s just funny.
To parents, we’ll never grow up and even those parents that are accepting to how old their kids are, what they are capable of, and even when their kids have kids of their own, to our parents, we are forever children. I’m sure my friend finds it annoying, but to me as the person on the sideline, I think it’s endearing.